I Wanna Be Bad For You Read online

  I grabbed a seat on my bike and continued to watch Anthony and Devyn bicker back and forth. She was too busy arguing to notice me staring, and I could tell that he was pissing her off by the way she was talking with her hands and shifting her weight from one foot to the other. I was glad that homie was fucking it up for himself. Lamar had briefly told me about the history that dude and Devyn had, so initially, I wasn’t sure if she was ready to start something new, or if it was a possibility that she would just end up right back with him. You could never tell with some women. Based off what I was seeing, I expected it be clear blue skies for me to swoop in a takeoff with her.

  UNKNOWN

  I sat back and watched for a bit as Rashaad and his crew carried on like a bunch of bosses. These niggas really thought that they could just swoop in and live like kingpins without a single care in the world. Watching them carry on, nearly had me sick to my stomach. They had another thing coming if they thought I was going to let them come through, out of nowhere, and take some shit that I felt was mines from the gate. For too long, I’d been forced to play the back as if it was cool.

  I peeped how Rashaad had slid off with the model looking bitch before she’d stepped to shorty he’d been hugged up with all day, and I couldn’t help but crack a smile. Without even knowing, Rashaad had just given me everything I needed to put my plans in motion. By the time I was done, they wouldn’t know what hit them. This game had been around for years, and dumb ass niggas always fell for letting a bitch be their downfall. This shit is going to be easy, I thought to myself, before heading out, unnoticed.

  Devyn

  I wanted to spit my drink out when I first spotted Anthony making his way across the park towards me. Out of all the years I’ve known him, he’d never really been one to hang out on the west side of the city being that he was from up north. Initially, I panicked a bit since, once again, I was in the presence of Rashaad when he saw me. It wasn’t that I cared that he knew that I was moving on, it was more so the fact that I just could not stand his ass, anymore.

  “So, you up here showing out with your thot ass friends and fighting over niggas now, huh?” Anthony said, getting up in my face. I stepped back and took a quick survey of my surroundings, hoping Rashaad couldn’t see what was going on.

  “Get the fuck out of my face, Ant!” I told him, with a slightly elevated voice. “I don’t have to explain shit to you, nor do I have to ask for your permission, seeing as though I’m single as fuck right now!”

  “You can think that shit if you want to, but we ain’t done until I fucking tell you we are.” He pointed his finger in my face. “So, you can keep running around here like a little hoe if you want to, and I bet I fuck you up!”

  Without even thinking, I slapped Anthony so hard that I was sure I’d left a mark. I turned on my heels and walked off toward the direction where we’d parked and hoped that Anthony didn’t dare to follow me, because I was over this conversation and just wanted to get away. I was sick of that shit and far too embarrassed to continue to argue with that dude. The time I had been spending away from Anthony, I could admit that I was honestly starting to like myself more. All my life, people had tried to control what I did, when I did it, and who I did it with, and it was way past the time that I started doing me.

  I’d made it all the way to the car before I realized that Sasha drove us, so there was no way for me to just take off unless I hopped on the bus. I looked down at the scratches that Mesha had left on my arm, then leaned up against the front of Sasha’s Range Rover exhaling all of my frustrations. I pulled my phone out and noticed I had two missed calls and text messages from Rina.

  Rina: Where are you?

  I hit her back and let her know that I was fine and that I’d walked back to the car just so I could clear my mind. A few seconds later, I heard the rumble of a motorcycle as it pulled up beside me. Rashaad had pulled up, making my kitty cat instantly moist, because his appeal just oozed sex. He pulled the bandana off of his face and flashed that sexy smile of his.

  “What’s good, Lil Mama? I know you mad at me, and all, but you was just gonna bounce without, at least, saying bye to me?” He said, leaning back and resting his arms on the back seat of the bike.

  “Nah, I wasn’t leaving. I just needed a break from the drama, plus I don’t want to be the reason why you guys’ cookout got ruined.” I told him, looking down at my feet.

  “Look at me.” He said. I looked up and found myself mesmerized at those beautiful green eyes of his. “That nigga is small time shit to a giant, Ma, and that shit with Mesha is definitely nothing!” He stressed. “Come take a ride with me.” He motioned for me to hop on.

  I hesitated, at first, because I wasn’t sure if I even wanted to be bothered with him at that moment, seeing as though I was already sharing drama with him before even getting a first kiss. Plus, I’d never been on a motorcycle before, but remembering what Rina said to me earlier, I pushed my nerves to the side, grabbed his hand, and threw my leg over the side. Then, I grabbed hold of Rashaad for dear life. Between his intoxicating scent, rock hard body against mines, and the vibrations of the bike, I was sure I would cum at any moment. Jesus take the wheel, I thought to myself.

  “Relax, Ma. I got you.” Rashaad said, looking back at me before pulling his bandana up, revving the engine, and pulling off. We rounded the corner back towards the park and Rashaad hopped off and said a few quick words to his brother. I caught a brief glimpse of Anthony in the crowd, and I could tell by the scowl on his face that he was pissed, but I couldn’t have cared less.

  When we took off again, I loosened the death grip I had on Rashaad, nuzzled my face into his back, and began to enjoy the ride, as we headed towards the downtown area. He parked the bike once we made it to the lake front and took my hand as we walked along the beach.

  “So, now that you let me kidnap you, you know what this means, right?” He asked me, as we walked the lake.

  “I’m sure you’re gonna tell me.” I said, not even trying to hide the fact that I was blushing.

  “Clearly, you won the battle with home girl earlier.” He joked.

  “That’s not even funny.” I said, giving him a playful push.

  “So, I’m staking my claim on you, Ma. You about to be mines.” He boasted, confidently.

  “Oh, really!” I retorted. “And, how many other women do you have a claim on, sir? Since you already have crazies coming after me. I don’t need to be having to look over my shoulder because of a man.” I told him, honestly.

  “Listen, I ain’t got nothing to hide. There isn’t a chick out here that can say she’s my woman. If I was on some slide-in type of shit with you, you would have known by now, ‘cause I wouldn’t be so interested in getting to know you.” He told me, stopping in his tracks. I could tell by his facial expression that he was sincere in what he was telling me.

  I wasn’t resistant to the thought. Hell, I was actually enjoying the attention, but I was far from a fool, so if he thought I believed, for one second, that he didn’t have the attention of other women, he had another thing coming. The chick from earlier hadn’t just come out of nowhere. I may have played the fool for too long, while dealing with Anthony, but I was, most definitely, far from a dumb girl. I couldn’t deny that our attraction was crazy, though, so I was willing to give this thing a shot.

  Mesha

  “Do your pussy have a split?” I nodded my head in response.

  “And, so does an ATM machine! So, make sure that every transaction ends with cash. That’s what’s wrong with you young bitches today, running around, letting these niggas bust y’all wide open and don’t get nothing out of it but wet panties! Your ass better be smarter than that JerMesha.”

  My mother pulled no punches when it came to putting me onto game. Growing up, if she had never taught me anything else, she had taught me how to use what I had to get what I wanted. I knew how much power pussy had before I’d even gotten my first period. Now, I know to some that may seem a bit messed up, bu
t the way I looked at it, everybody was using someone for something every day. I just wasn’t going to hide the fact that I did it. Can’t fault a bitch for being honest.

  Don’t get me wrong, because, I made my own money, but I’d be damned if any nigga thought they were fucking for free. If you let me tell it, I carried the gates of heaven between my legs, and niggas these days usually fell in line once I blessed them with Ms. Kitty; but, not Rashaad.

  I couldn’t believe how that nigga had just tried to play me! I mean, I know we didn’t have no titles on the shit that we were doing, but Rashaad should have known that my crazy ass wasn’t just going to let my meal ticket walk away with the next bitch without a fight. I was tired of playing the back for niggas, and I was trying my hardest to lay the ground work to officially lock Rashaad down, but DAMN, how much more did a bitch have to do?!

  Rashaad was everything I’d wanted in a man; he had a bitch wanting to settle down, so when I’d gotten out of the car at the park, I had every intention on going home and being a good girl to wait for Rashaad’s call, but then I said, FUCK THAT! There was no reason for me to sit back and let my man mingle with no other hoes, so I doubled back to the park, and low and behold, I see him hugged up with the next bitch. My blood was boiling.

  Clearly, I hadn’t thought things out before I stepped to ‘ole girl, because my ass was many things, but a fighter wasn’t one of them. I could talk shit with the best, but seeing as though my face was my meal ticket, I wasn’t trying to mess that up by scrapping on the streets like one of those ratchet bitches on WorldStar. I was more of a poke the bear and throw the stick type of girl. Something in me had just snapped just seeing my man cozying up with the broad, though. In public no less! Like for real! I’d just tried to suck this niggas soul out through his dick, and in the blink of an eye, he was boo’d up with some random.

  Initially, I’d had my usual mentality when I peeped Rashaad at my friend’s birthday party a few months back. Hell, it was hard not to when he’d walked in the spot looking just like money. His Gucci loafers, alone, had me trying to figure out ways to ditch the dude I had came there with. It wasn’t hard getting his attention in the end, though. I mean, I am that thang. After a few rounds of cat and mouse, I had him right where I’d wanted him.

  Rashaad wasn’t the typical street dude that I’d dealt with, though. He was smart, his swag was crazy, and needless to say, he was sexy as hell. Maybe, that’s why I wanted his ass so bad, and it was no problem going out of my way trying to make him want me like I wanted him. I wouldn’t say that my heart was crushed seeing him with this temporary chick, because I knew that I was working on being permanent, but I certainly felt like my territory was being invaded.

  ~~~

  I walked back to my car with a bloody nose, pissed. All the while, thinking to myself that that negro was lucky that I didn’t see his car parked in the area, because I would have popped my trunk for my bat and smashed all of his fucking windows. The side of my face was throbbing, and with the amount of blood dripping from my nose, I was dreading my reflection.

  “This is some bullshit!” I said to myself, while looking in my visor mirror. I could already see the left side of my face beginning to swell.

  I had been so caught up in my own thoughts that I hadn’t even noticed the Spanish-looking chick approach my car until she tapped on the glass. I could tell that she was butch from her appearance, but she was definitely cute. Her long hair was pulled back into a ponytail, and tucked under a NY fitted cap, and she had tattoos that adorned her arms and neck and complimented her thuggish stance. She kind of reminded me of the rapper, Siyah. Now, I wasn’t one to discriminate over men or women, so I found myself looking at her up and down, lustfully. Hell, if they paid my bills, I would entertain almost anybody.

  “Aye, shorty, you good?” She asked, when I rolled my window down.

  “Yea, I’m alright.” I responded, attempting to turn up my charm, even though I was sure I looked a hot ass mess.

  “Yea, I peeped what went down over there. So, you know, I just wanted to make sure you was straight.” She said, licking her lips. “You know you way too pretty to be out here wilding like that, baby girl. If anybody bringing you to that point, it’s time to leave that shit alone, and get ya mind right. Straight up.”

  “Yea, you right.” I agreed, with a sigh.

  “I’m, D, by the way.” She extended her hand.

  “Mesha.” I responded, as I shook her hand through the window. The game never stopped for me. Even though I was sitting there looking a damn mess, I still had bills that needed to be paid. That shit wasn’t over with Rashaad, though; not by a long shot. One thing I was never good at doing was backing down. I just had to make him see that I could be whatever he needed me to be as long as he was mine.

  Rashaad

  “So, home girl still being stingy with her cootie cat, Steebie!” Meek was cracking up, while mocking me in the worse Joseline from Love and Hip Hop impersonation I’d ever heard. It had been a little over a month since Devyn and I had been kicking it after that incident at the park. I hadn’t pressed her about sex, simply, because I was digging her. She was a cool chick, and if things continued to go like they’d been, I could see myself wifing her.

  For now, I was cool just getting to know her better. She was giving me that feeling of living like a normal nigga, too. She would cook for me, we’d get our Netflix and chill on, sit up all night and just talk. With the fast life that I was used to, she was something out of the ordinary, and I was appreciating that. I was even finding myself texting her through out the day when we weren’t around each other.

  “Nigga, you a clown!” I laughed, as we exited the airport. We’d just walked into O’Hare Airport to catch a flight to New York. We wanted to tell our father, personally, how business was running smoothly since we’d set up shop. We were doing numbers, and almost overnight, it seemed like everybody knew our names.

  “Man, all I’m saying is you putting in a lot of time with shorty for her not to be giving it up.” Meek continued. Devyn and I had been spending a lot of time together over the past few weeks. It had gotten to the point where you’d rarely see me without her but, because she was still holding out. So I still found time to fuck with Mesha every now and again. Shit, a nigga had needs, but when I got back from New York, I planned on pressing Devyn a little harder. At the end of the day, we were too old for the games, and I was never the type of nigga to have to beg for pussy.

  After a short flight, we met up with our father at Don Coqui, in City Island, for lunch. Aside from the guys on his security detail and Vic, the place was empty.

  “Bienvenidos mi hijos!” (Welcome my sons!) He greeted us with a smile. Much like my mother, my father seemed to be aging in reverse. Aside from the streak of gray in his black hair, you would have thought that he was Meek and I’s brother.

  “What’s up, Pop”! I said, embracing him. “Bendicion.” (Blessings)

  I gave a quick head nod to Vic, who was standing off in the corner, before taking a seat at the table. I’d noticed the shift in energy when my father began to speak.

  “I requested that you both come here, because the time is nearing that I make my court appearance, and because I’m not sure of the outcome as of yet, I wanted to make sure that you both were prepared for what may happen.” Hearing my father speak on his pending court case made me tense up. Being in the drug game came with consequences that we were all aware of. And it was not secret that jail or death always carried the greatest end result.

  “I’ve been speaking with my legal counsel, and they assure me that the majority of the case being built against me won’t stick, but my greatest concern lies with where the information they obtained came from.”

  I saw Meek give Vic a deathly stare out the corner of my eye. I knew my brother’s feelings on the situation and that he never really trusted Vic growing up, but since he wasn’t trying to hide it anymore, I wanted to ask him where all that animosity was coming from. I mea
n, I know tensions were high right now because of the situation with my father, but at a time like that, new beefs weren’t needed.

  “Con calma hijo, que ha demostrado se leales.” (Calm down, son. He has proven to be loyal) My father said, picking up on the heat coming from Meek.

  “I’ve had people looking into the matter since it first came to light. It appears that my baby mama has been running her mouth.” He said. I furrowed my brow at his last statement, because there was no way my mother would discuss my father’s business with anyone, let alone, the authorities. Despite what they went through, it was abundantly clear that, even to this day, she loved my father, dearly.

  “Hold up. My mother would never sell you out. You tripping, Pop!” Meek said, now directing his anger towards my father.

  “I know, son. Regina is my love, and I could never refer to her as just my baby mama, and I would never think that she would do anything to, intentionally, hurt me, even though I know I have hurt her in the past. However, the fact remains that I did father a child with someone else of less importance.” His nostrils flared at his last statement. “But, that is a problem that I wanted to speak to you both about face-to-face. I have not seen or heard from Danielle in many years. I sent her money every month, but the last I’d heard, she’d taken your sister and left New York some time ago; I haven’t heard from her since.” He took a sip of his Brugal before continuing. “The fact remains that, in my life, I have made my fair share of enemies. I just wanted you two to know that there is nothing that you should be worrying about, because everything will be handled in due time.”

  Before showing up on our doorstep years ago, we’d never seen or heard from our mystery sibling. Growing up, it had been taboo to even bring the topic up in conversation. When my mother left, it was like she avoided even mentioning my fathers name for a while. If it wasn’t for the fact that my mother left, it would have been hard to believe that the whole thing had even happened. Over the years, my father had always continued to financially support my mother, and although she accepted the money, she avoided having contact with my father, at all costs, for a while.